The Night Before

I do love a good birthday.

It’s the eve of my entrance into the world and I’m giddy like a child.

Every time I look up from some menial, ordinary task and remember that tomorrow is my day I turn right back into a nine year old again.

I’ve escaped the nest for a few hours here at the arrangement of my husband who knows that his introverted wife needs time to dream, and rethink, and ponder life alone every once in a while.

He’s a good man. I think I’ll keep him forever and ever and ever.

I have my journal sprawled open on an outside cafe table. The sun is dipping. Cars are whipping round with their windows down blaring this summer’s playlists. People are conversing. Eating. Welcoming the weekend.

I’m making lists. Praying. Expectant as to what may rise up this go around.

I never could have imagined, this time last year, that I would be where I am. I’m glad I’m here, but I’m still surprised at it. This is stunting my planning a bit, as I’m learning that things rarely turn out as dreamt.

Nevertheless, I consider thinking up future endeavors and current revisions a very healthy task. I at least can have an idea as to what I’m striving for. This is helpful in decision making.

As I type, I’m tossing around a few fine things I ran across in my readings this afternoon…

“Dreams should be attached to strengths. When we distort the truth about our kids’ potential, their dreams won’t match their gifts, and disillusionment will follow.” (From Tim Elmore’s Twelve Huge Mistakes Parents Can Avoid)

While I’m reading this book to learn how to better parent my children, I’m learning how to better lead my own self.

So kicking this thought around tonight as I aim, and angle, and plot – I feel reins about me now. Good ones.

I’m a dreamer in my deepest being. I can imagine anything, anywhere, with anyone. This is grand in storytelling. Not so grand in the realistic planning of life.

So those words up there from Dr. Elmore – they appropriately bridle me.

I feel helped, guided, restrained yet released in a beautiful way. So good.

As a wannabe writer, that right there is what I’m after…

Kindly corralling people to the place of their highest potential. Inspiring them there. Heartening them there. Let it be so, Lord. Anoint what pours forth from these fingers. Void of You, they’re void of life. Please do touch and tinge the words woven from me and my contemporaries. Let them be led to You from the things we lace together. Same for all the artists, of every kind, everywhere. Yes and amen.

And I think that’s a real good place to land, yes?

A new flight begins tomorrow as I wing my way into another year of being. Lord, bless it. 

Big birthday hugs all around.

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